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Does Size Matter? - Audio Only 🎧 | Cruise Cast Ep.26

• Linzi & Mark - Suite Natured • Season 1 • Episode 26

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This episode of the Cruise Cast explores the seemingly ever increasing size of cruise ships, deliberating whether larger ships enhance or detract from the cruise experience. We discuss the balance between passenger convenience and the thrill of mega ships and we have a new Cruise Confession and our take on recent  cruise news.

00:00 Introduction to Cruise Ship Size
02:25 Pros of Larger Cruise Ships
09:59 Challenges of Big Ships in Ports
14:47 The Experience of Crowded Destinations
19:55 Cruise Confessions and Personal Stories
30:10 Cruise News and Innovations

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Cheers, and have a lovely day
Linzi & Mark

Support the show

If you enjoyed this episode please consider supporting the channel via our YouTube Membership https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNaAHapT85jdtLYwrJhFsCw/join

And please consider subscribing to the channel https://youtube.com/c/suitenatured to keep up to date with all our latest videos, podcasts and live streams

Cheers, and have a lovely day
Linzi & Mark

Linzi:

Welcome to episode 26 of the Suite Natured Cruise Cast. Hi, I'm Linz. As always, I'm joined by Marky.

Mark:

Hello.

Linzi:

Hello, and today we're talking size and have cruise ships got too big. But first and I can't wait for this, this week's mood music. I could hear lyrics.

Mark:

You could hear lyrics. I had no big shape. You were filling in. You were putting your own words for the topic. I could hear lyrics. You could hear lyrics. I had no big shape. You were filling in. You were creating your own words for the topic.

Linzi:

I could hear it. It was like I mean, it suits it, and I really don't know why.

Mark:

I mean I'll take that. I'm happy that you could create your own lyrics. If you're watching or listening to this and would like to send your lyrics, uh, in in the comments about size, because today we're talking about whether size matters, which is what I think you were getting at when you're being cheeky with that intro I'm never cheeky.

Mark:

I don't know what you're talking about but we are talking specifically about whether ships are getting too big, um, and the pros and cons to that. We've also got the return of a cruise confession. I did find one that was suitable, suitable, that wasn't going to get us banned from everything, okay, um. And we've got our usual cruise stories. Yeah, our news, our cruise news stories that you like to tell me I do, and you can react and let me know what you think have a drink.

Mark:

Well, you've been looking at that gnt for the last few seconds and I'm amazed you didn't pick it up just before we started.

Linzi:

What a day.

Mark:

And then this but is this the good bit of the day now? Ooh, it's just been a full-on workday for you, hasn't it? We will use this as a therapy session, because it's maybe not that exciting for people watching.

Linzi:

No, just as a therapy session, because it's maybe not that exciting for people watching.

Mark:

No, and also there's not a lot you can do about it, and that includes me. Yeah, it's just what I'm doing at work. But let's get into the topic then Cruise ships and size. So one of the sort of early cruise ships that we went on at the time was um, one of the biggest in the world, which was at the time, which was oasis of the seas.

Linzi:

still is oasis that wasn't the first one we went on.

Mark:

No, I'm saying was one of the first ones, the first one that we went on. Navigator of the seas. Just before we went on, it was the biggest ship in the world but now seems tiny by comparison.

Linzi:

It was a big one, yes um, but nowadays no, no, that's quite, yeah, sort of quite small size, I think yeah, absolutely.

Mark:

But oasis, when we first went on that, that was our sort of first experience of the being being our ship with sort of 5 000 passengers but it was everybody's first experience of being on a ship with 5,000 passengers.

Mark:

It was At the time and I still stick by this for Oasis because it remains one of my favourite class of ships. I think it's sort of that perfect big ship because of its design, how the passenger flow works. I think a lot of people think, when it comes to big ships and this is certainly a pro to big ship cruising as opposed to a contract that they handle the passenger flow really well. You can. We've been on ships that have two and a half three thousand passengers that feel much busier, would you agree?

Linzi:

um, I know what you're saying and I, I guess, um, I guess I know what you're saying. There's those neighborhoods, isn't there? So like, yeah, when you talk about more caribbean and we never felt that we were on a ship with all those people no, because people are so well separated.

Mark:

There's so many things going on at the same time. The theatre's always regardless.

Linzi:

It's always perspective, isn't it? It always seems busy at certain crunch points.

Mark:

Yeah, no matter what size ship you're on whether you're on one at 700, 800, 900, if it's main dining room time and everyone's heading there at 6 o'clock or 8 o'clock it's going to seem busier because that's going to be one of the times where you see lots of passengers. If there's a big show on or a special guest, you'll get more people going to see that than you would. Just an everyday sort of production, so you see more people at that point. On the bigger ships, certainly, from our experience today and we've not been on the Icon class yet, which is the world's biggest ship, royal Caribbean's, but the ones sort of just below that Wonder of the Seas, harmony type they still seem to handle that size really well. But I get why the thought of being on with that many passengers puts people off.

Mark:

Yeah, I can too what do you think of the other sort of pros trip before we get into sort of the cons?

Linzi:

um, I'm gonna say a pro. It feels like you. You actually and I know this is gonna sound weird you're not necessarily on a cruise ship, you're more in a very snazzy city.

Mark:

Yeah, it feels more like a resort.

Linzi:

It does feel very much like a resort. There's not the quirky up to go down, to go backwards to go forwards. Design.

Mark:

No.

Linzi:

Like a.

Mark:

Cunard ship. Yeah, the passenger sort of flow that they have through them is designed to sort of get people from here to be as quickly as possible, passing as many touch points as they can.

Linzi:

Looking at Royal Caribbean, there's always the area that you know the Royal Plaza. What's?

Mark:

it called the Pomenade, the Royal Pomenade.

Linzi:

The Royal Pomenade.

Mark:

Well, at this point we haven't actually been on.

Linzi:

Royal.

Mark:

Caribbean for about seven years.

Linzi:

We are on it this September. We are too. Yeah, yeah, and I've got my holidays cleared for that.

Mark:

As well, oh, fantastic. Anyone who's coming on the group clues will be glad that you're actually coming with us.

Mark:

I'm glad that you're coming with us, yeah, but yeah, that sort of promenade bit. For me, one of the things that I really do love about larger ship cruising is the amount of choice on there, and by that I mean the amount of bars that you've got, the amount of restaurant specialty dining as well as inclusive dining, the amount of entertainment you know, certainly when you're on those bigger ships. It covers everything from trivia that you see on every ship type through to ice skating. You've done what's it called the parachuting? I can't remember what it's called.

Linzi:

Oh, the iFly, iFly thank you. That was on Anthem.

Mark:

Was that on Anthem you?

Linzi:

did that on, not Oasis.

Mark:

You've got things like the waterboarding. Waterboarding, that's a very specialist one. It's not called waterboarding. What's it called? It's not surfboarding, weightboarding.

Linzi:

I'm sorry.

Mark:

I'm sorry, I'm torturing people. In my mind, there's definitely no torturing going on.

Linzi:

It would be for some people, though, that size ship.

Mark:

Well, it probably would be.

Linzi:

I think it would. I can think of some of our friends, cruise friends that that just would feel a little bit much for them.

Mark:

I know a lot of people who would absolutely not go on a ship of that size and I think that in their head they think it's just going to be packed all the time, which we've already touched on, that, yeah, and that they're going to be queuing for everything.

Linzi:

On the mega, mega ships.

Mark:

Yeah.

Linzi:

Yes, that is.

Mark:

But is that a reality? Do you queue that much on them?

Linzi:

We haven't done it for a while, though. That's the thing, and also when we did it, we were in a suite.

Mark:

Well, this is true.

Linzi:

So the last time we went on. We were in a suite, but I don't remember. Yes, but we can't.

Mark:

I don't, I'm not sure we can well, maybe we come back to this topic a little bit more or touch on it after we've done sort of well grabbing in september, because that's on independence of the cities, which, again, at one point was the world's biggest ship, yeah, yeah, um. So by comparison now it doesn't seem no that's big, but it's still huge compared to things like sort of queen mary too, or what now?

Linzi:

what we have done is princess's biggest ship, as she as a princess yeah, and we also did one of the princess's little ships.

Mark:

We did.

Linzi:

In a very short space of time.

Mark:

Yeah, I found that we queued more on the smaller ship when we went on Ruby than we did when we went on Sun.

Linzi:

Yes, but again, I was saying that we were in a suite on Ruby.

Mark:

We weren't in a suite on Sun Noy. We weren't in a suite on sun.

Linzi:

No, we weren't in a suite on sun we didn't have any special privileges in there.

Mark:

Special privileges no I meant like the suite pass or yacht club or things like that. No, we just had we had, we had we had speciality dinners, if you remember when we got on ruby I had to queue up to get your 24-karat margarita and I was queuing up at the bar for about 20 minutes.

Linzi:

Oh yeah, when we first got on yeah. We didn't ever, yes, but it was still quicker than the two hours it took when we got on some princess.

Mark:

On some, yeah, but that wasn't anything down to the ship, that was down to us filming.

Linzi:

No, that was down to you.

Mark:

That was down to me.

Linzi:

That was down to you.

Mark:

That is not down to the ship. We can't blame Princess for that at all.

Linzi:

Denying me my 24 karat gold margarita for two hours. Two hours Was it. Two hours, it was two.

Mark:

Or did it just feel like two hours? Oh, I was going to really swear then I'm glad there's no video evidence that shows how long it was. No, so all right, we've talked about a lot of the pros there. What do you think are the negatives to it, other than perception of it being busy?

Linzi:

Getting into ports.

Mark:

Great one. This is, like you sort of know a bit about cruising I know a little bit.

Mark:

No, it's a really valid point because increasingly, um, globally, a lot of the cruise ports are reducing down the size of the ships or the number of passengers that can green on any one day. Yeah, um, and also some ports are not deep enough. We touched on in the um news story in the I think it was the previous episode where belfast was having, um, an extension to its harbour to make it deeper because the big ones can't get in there. Why are you starting to laugh there?

Linzi:

oh, I try to be good I don't think it's in my nature what were?

Mark:

were you going to say Nothing? Were you just being cheeky in your?

Linzi:

head. No, I'm just, I think I've got a problem. I really think I've got a problem.

Mark:

Do you want to confess to this problem?

Linzi:

Now.

Mark:

What's the problem? What is the problem?

Linzi:

I just, I, just I don't Shall, we move on. I'm going to get cancelled.

Mark:

We can't cancel you. Yeah, I think going back to your point of it not being able to get into ports is a really valid one.

Linzi:

Thank, you, thank you.

Mark:

Especially if you go into places like the fjords.

Linzi:

And also, if you do get into port, they're not necessarily the prettiest either, because you're basically with the big container ships yeah, I think, yeah, fair point.

Mark:

I think. One other bit where when you're on a big ship, where you do notice the numbers because we've said when you're on the ship you don't really notice them because they do it very well but when you get 5,000 to 7,000 people getting off at one of the private islands off of one of the ships and then another of the ships pulls in with another 3,000 or 4,000 on, all of a sudden you do see what 10,000 or 11,000 passengers descending on a beach looks like.

Linzi:

Nassau is another one for that. To see what 10 or 11,000 passengers descending on a beach looks like. Yeah, Nassau is another one for that. We like to play a game in Nassau. Which ship did that person get off?

Mark:

I'm trying to guess. Sometimes it's obvious If there's a Disney ship in and they get off with the ears on, that does give it away. Other times it's a little bit harder. But in Nassau we've been in there when there's been sort of four or five really big ships in there, and when you get into the town it's absolutely when you get through where the new part is, and yeah, it's, it's and you walk on to senor frogs everybody knows where senor frogs is in nau.

Linzi:

You don't even have to have been. You can probably picture it's crazy.

Mark:

Yeah, it's chaos, isn't it? That's the downside to sort of those resorts like that where they welcome lots of big ships simultaneously because they have got the capacity to do it.

Linzi:

but it does seem very crowded and I say, if you look at going to perfect day on royal caribbean, you could end up with um icon in there and later this year, star of the seas at the same time I guarantee that'll happen at the same time they know what they're doing now, because if you know you're going on that day, and whichever private island it is, whichever cruise line it is, if you know that you're on the big ship and they're getting another big ship in there on that day, that, in order to get that, um, beach resort experience, I know where you're going with this.

Mark:

Yeah, you're gonna pay for one of the better areas.

Linzi:

You're gonna have to pay for one of the better areas. You're going to have to pay for one of the VIP prior areas, and that's where.

Mark:

Royal Caribbean has its very controversial dynamic pricing on the island, depending on demand and when there's somewhere between 10,000 and 14,000 people going to be on there when Star comes out as well, then you can imagine that those prices are very expensive because already on some days, incredibly expensive.

Linzi:

It's like another price of a cruise, and then some.

Mark:

we've seen it at three, four $5,000 for a cabana. We'd never pay that.

Linzi:

Who's in the cabana?

Mark:

We'll go back to your theme cruise bit. Well, that's where you get invited into one. We like to live with them in superman, uh, but I think that is a big downside to I didn't, I didn't tell you I got an invite did you get an invite through? Yes, but not for that ah, who did you get the invite from? I cannot say oh fancy, I didn't see it, so obviously I'm not going. What other negatives have we got?

Linzi:

Another negative Apart from the shopping mall experience, because we're now they wheel out the little tack trolleys.

Mark:

I mean to be fair. Most of the cruise lines Do that on cruise ships of all sizes.

Linzi:

I call them the tat trolleys.

Mark:

I'm there at the front as well to see what baggings and what the cheap tops are yeah. I mean occasionally they do have some good offers on in those ones, but then it feels again.

Linzi:

It doesn't feel resorty, it doesn't feel, it feels quite shopping molly it is, and I think when you get those? Sort of events on and the thing by the inch.

Mark:

Gold by the inch. Are you on a size matters again?

Linzi:

No, you know what I'm saying.

Mark:

Yeah, they sell the little gold chains by the inch.

Linzi:

Yeah, I feel that always sort of.

Mark:

Well, gold chains, yeah, I feel that always sort of well. I was thinking not specifically the sales base, because you see it get busier there when they put those on. But you see that on cruise ships of all sizes I don't think that's a specific problem to the larger ones. I don't think you get any more people turning them. I think they just end up being busy from there were cruisers that like to go to them.

Linzi:

Oh no, people love to buy things on the cruise as a memento. I get that. It's like a little take-home memory. I get that. It just can sometimes. It can sometimes feel as a it's a bit. It takes you out of that relaxation holiday cruise, yeah it does.

Mark:

I was thinking about sort of where you get those sort of promenade type parties on. So they do them on Royal Caribbean, they do them on MSC, for instance.

Linzi:

Yes, they do.

Mark:

The Carnival Night they do on when we went on MSC Virtuosa. There's footage of that in our Virtuosa review. That is probably the busiest that I've ever seen. A part of land that's not coming out or into a football match. It would just absolutely chocker sort of side to side. People couldn't move, but people were loving it.

Linzi:

No, it did feel a bit Wembley way. I know what you're saying, yeah.

Mark:

That's what I was meaning in sort of that way, yeah, yeah yeah, but I get why people wouldn't want that experience. You know Virtuoso we talked about there. That's not one of the really big ships, but it's still a big ship.

Linzi:

No, but I like Virtuoso the way that we did it.

Mark:

In yacht climbing that you can get back out and ride yeah and I think that's the secret If you can have a little private enclave for you that feels very luxurious and and be fair, that can just be your cabin it can be just your cabin, but as long as you've got somewhere to escape or a little lounger that only you know about, then and yeah well, that's one of the things that I do like about the big ships that there are so many places where you can go where nobody else is going to be there, or there might be one or two yeah, but I worry because I've never got the shade then no, there can be inside.

Mark:

So if you think about when we went on apex, there's those areas upstairs on eden during the day.

Linzi:

Yes, it's all inside so you don't have to worry about getting sunburned. Absolutely beautiful.

Mark:

Practically nobody goes there. No, you can go there, listen to some music, read a book.

Linzi:

I'd swing about Play cards. Have a little swing.

Mark:

Yeah, there's a swing up there. There are so many places on the bigger ships where you can go find moments of solitude.

Linzi:

Moments of solitude. Are you a Superman?

Mark:

I am, yeah, I'm hoping to get an invite to this cabana.

Linzi:

I'm not going to a cabana.

Mark:

Oh, who Tell me afterwards? But I think you find them easier to find on the bigger ships than you do on the smaller ships. The smaller ships tend not to have as many areas where they can go to I understand anything else that you can think of for sort of the negative side to it so we talked about too busy talked about not being able to get into.

Mark:

I don't think price is really a thing apart from the price no, I know, icon of the seas has been very expensive in its first year. Yes, but it doesn't always mean that a bigger ship is more expensive If you look at something like Oasis or Lowe from Royal Caribbean.

Linzi:

They are coming down a bit, those are quite reasonably priced. Reasonably priced. That's why I said quite.

Mark:

I guess there's a lot of amenities and facilities for you and there's often more likely to be last minute offers available on the bigger ships, again, not the brand new ships, not icon of the seas type, but on the bigger ships because they've got that much spare capacity.

Linzi:

Yeah, but sometimes in the flights.

Mark:

Again I was going to swear, but the flights get you if you, yeah, but you might be lucky enough to live close to somewhere where you don't have to fly.

Linzi:

And that's the thing we southampton, don't we get big ships. We don't get super mega ships. No, because I think the super mega ships are also very geared to something that we've not seen for a while, called the sun and warmth.

Mark:

How we are in now talking, and it's like minus two outside, something I definitely think that the ultra mega ships, so your icon of the seas, um, and and that size ship yeah, all the big ships are available, um, but I'm thinking about this one visually in my head at the moment. Such a huge amount of real estate on the top of that ship is for hot climates on it.

Linzi:

A lot of the big ones are so that's why you see them.

Mark:

The really big ones just pretty much live in sort of the Caribbean or the Mediterranean in summer.

Linzi:

Because they've got that lovely solarium for Royal Caribbean. I know we're doing a lot of Royal Caribbean in a minute, but even the celebrity ships I I mean we've got apex now that's coming out of the uk and that's got a lot of um open deck area it has, but the big ships also have a lot of inside area as well they do, but they they're very geared to the sunshine the, the gear trip. I feel we've got a different opinion.

Mark:

No, they're not going in there um, but I feel that you've got in sort of poorer weather. You've got more options to do that's true than you do on a smaller ship, where it won't have all the slides and things necessarily on top and sort of um the air flying stuff and things like that and rock walls, but it'll, it has a lot inside, whereas the smaller ones don't really have that capacity. You can tell whenever we've been on a smaller ship and by small I'm saying anything that's 2 000 passengers and below I guess, all right.

Mark:

So it's still relatively big, yeah, but anything of that size. When the weather's bad inside, it's a nightmare to try and find a seat in a bar or get a coffee. Everywhere's just random because they haven't got that spare capacity.

Linzi:

No.

Mark:

In the bigger ships there's still so much spare space inside. Yes, that, yeah, you will tell it's a lot busier, but you'll still better go get a seat in a bar. Yeah, you'll still better go get a coffee without having to wait an hour.

Linzi:

I was just thinking there were time. We were in the med on harmony of the seas and I got a little bit choppy and a bit rainy only once, but again we didn't feel that we were um, that it. It was that busy. The thing that I remember most of all from that cruise is when we were sat at the back hall where the divers are and everything.

Mark:

Oh, the aqua theatre.

Linzi:

Aqua theatre. It was daytime, we were just chilling with a drink and do you remember that there was that private Lear jet that flew over us, went straight past us and then the military jets followed it. Yeah, and everybody went. What the yeah. It was crazy.

Mark:

Filming and taking pictures.

Linzi:

Yes, Like never seen them, like a mid-air.

Mark:

It was very low as well, wasn't it?

Linzi:

Oh, and that's the thing about the big ships. People are like oh, I'll fly my Learjet right at the side of this. And then of course we got buzzed by the military jets and that was very exciting, but yeah, that's. You see, not regular size ships don't really attract that kind of attention. Yeah, so yeah, what are we saying? Do we like big?

Mark:

I do of attention, yeah, so yeah, what are we saying? Do we like big? I do, but I I think that I don't have a problem with size. I don't think size necessarily matters when it comes to cruise ships. You can have a fantastic cruise whether you're on a ship that holds 300 people or a ship that holds 7 000 are we saying it's the company it is definitely, regardless of the size.

Linzi:

It's who you with and what you do it is absolutely that.

Mark:

That's that. That's the takeout from from us.

Linzi:

Oh, that's nice thank you um.

Mark:

Do you want a cruise confession? Let me have a drink first okay, I'll have a drink as well, because I have to read it out.

Linzi:

I think I need it for these.

Mark:

If you have got a cruise confession, please do send them in to us, because we are starting to run low on them now. I just If we have them, they weren't appropriate.

Linzi:

But just send me any kind of confession, I'll take it.

Mark:

You're quite happy to just read them, normally, aren't you, even if we don't necessarily read them online.

Linzi:

Just holiday confessions, packing confessions.

Mark:

Let us know, Tom.

Linzi:

So whose confession?

Mark:

This one is from Sam. That is the real name. Oh, don't tell me that you don't know him.

Linzi:

S it's from.

Mark:

S it's not from S, it's from Sam they. Well, you don't know them. S it's from S it's not from S it's from Sam. They said I could use the name. Okay, dear Mark and Lindsay. Okay, my confession involves a drinks package, a regrettable lack of self-control and a sincere apology to a certain gentleman in a rather fetching Hawaiian shirt. You see, I purchased the ultimate beverage package.

Linzi:

Love you Sam.

Mark:

My passport to own the maid cocktails. Mocktails in brackets not so many of them and everything in between.

Linzi:

I'm just trying to think when I had a mocktail we will have had them. I'm not sure I've had them. I'm not sure that's one thing I've ever done on a cruise.

Mark:

We need to travel. I think you could have a mocktail in the morning.

Linzi:

No.

Mark:

I don't even think about a mocktail in the morning. Anyway, back to Sam. I was determined to wring every last drop of value From that package, and wring I did. You would have been proud. I became a whirlwind of bottomless bliss Bloody marys and mimosas for breakfast. Is this you who actually wrote this in AKA?

Linzi:

Sam.

Mark:

Furs and margaritas. At lunch it sounded more like you. Why not mojitos by the pool? Don't mind if I do what's that?

Linzi:

why not, or why no?

Mark:

no, why not a round of tequila shots with my new karaoke friends? Absolutely my liver is this me. It could well this Absolutely. My liver may never forgive me, but at least I was living my best, slightly blurry life.

Linzi:

I'm just trying to think do I have a split personality?

Mark:

You've sent us this confession in late one night, when you don't remember. I don't think it was you. It definitely wasn't your email.

Linzi:

But it's like an email, it sounds like an email, yeah alternate Lindsay.

Mark:

However, my enthusiastic embrace of the ultimate beverage experience had some unintended consequences.

Linzi:

Oh no.

Mark:

Specifically during the tropical-themed party. Oh, fueled by an excessive number of blue Hawaiians. Oh, that blue curacao is a killer yeah, you don't realize how strong they are until you're like five or six and then realize that your legs don't work properly and everything that comes out is blue for days and your tongue. I attempted to demonstrate my non-existing, non-existent hula dancing skills. This involved a lot of enthusiastic hip shaking, questionable hand gestures and a complete disregard for personal space.

Mark:

It is me Unfortunately my impromptu Hulu performance collided with a rather unfortunate gentleman in a rather fetching Hawaiian shirt. He ended up drenched in his blue cocktail his pristine shirt now a casualty of my overzealous enthusiasm. I vaguely remember offering him a napkin and a slurred apology, but I suspect it wasn't my finest moment. So to the gentleman in the hawaiian shirt, if you're listening to this, I offer my sincerest apologies. I was, shall we say, overly enthusiastic in my celebration of all things tropical. I hope the stain came out of his shirt and I promise to stick to mocktails from now on. Okay, that's not true, but I will try and get better at hula dancing. Hoping for forgiveness, sam.

Linzi:

So basically, Sam, you smurfed somebody.

Mark:

Is that what it's called? I think it is. I think smurfing might be another one of these things. That might be something different. If you can safely search not at work for smurfing might be another one of these things that might be something different. No, if you can safely search not at work for smurfing. Smurfing sounds like it would be different to throwing someone a blue cocktail.

Linzi:

No, you smurfed them by turning them blue.

Mark:

I'm fairly sure that it's going to be something else.

Linzi:

Is this an urban dictionary?

Mark:

thing again. It sounds like it would be.

Linzi:

Oh, this gets me into so much trouble.

Mark:

So we'll see what comes from that. So are you.

Linzi:

I'm totally forgiving them because I think it's me.

Mark:

There's half a chance that it's your alternate personality that you don't know about.

Linzi:

If I was, I mean, it does sound like me All the drinks.

Mark:

Yeah.

Linzi:

They're thinking they can hula hoop that you don't know about If I was.

Mark:

I mean, it does sound like me. All the drinks yeah.

Linzi:

They're thinking they can hula hoop, not hula hoop. Hula dance, do you not hula hoop?

Mark:

in a hula dance. No, like Hawaiian hula dancing.

Linzi:

With the coconuts.

Mark:

I don't know if there were coconuts, sam didn't specify but it's like a hula, dance's like, oh, with a grass skirt. Yeah, I don't think there was no suggestion of a ring being involved you had checked out smurfing no, this is true anyway. Are we forgiving sam? Oh goodness yes because it's me, it sounds like a genuine accident and you, you sound like you had a fantastic time.

Linzi:

I bet they liked it really.

Mark:

I bet they did and they'll have told that story as well.

Linzi:

Yeah, they've been dining out on that for years.

Mark:

I was smurfed on a cruise ship. Right cruise story number one. What were that noise for?

Linzi:

I feel, Sam, I feel. Are you going back to Sam?

Mark:

here Is Sam, feeling like a soulmate here.

Linzi:

Sam is feeling like a soulmate. Sam I, I forgive you. I forgive you, I trust you.

Mark:

I'm not going anywhere with my shirts on thank you.

Linzi:

Thank you, blue drinks are blue. That are very yeah blue drinks.

Mark:

I'm not a massive. I can't remember having a blue drink and going. I'm a massive fan of that oh I've had lots of them it didn't.

Linzi:

It's when, if there's one, we mix it with disarano that sounds like I'd like that one it's a killer I need to look at.

Mark:

What is it just?

Linzi:

around. I'm curious.

Mark:

I don't know what it's called we have those things in oh it's, it's a, it's an absolute killer we'll have to try one on our next cruise.

Linzi:

Okay.

Mark:

Blue cocktail.

Linzi:

We're going to do a blue one. We'll do a blue one, and then I'm going to pour it on you.

Mark:

Right, so we get on to the cruise news stories.

Linzi:

Yeah, okay, back in the room.

Mark:

More information's come out this week On a company called Clyive built's cruise ship. Uh, you mentioned this to me the other day. Is this the dark island?

Linzi:

dark island, which very strange name I don't think I want to go on dark island.

Mark:

Well just hold your horses there while I tell you some things about it. So for those of you that have not heard of dark island, it's still weird name for a cruise ship.

Linzi:

It sounds like I named it. It does when I was in a dark mood.

Mark:

It is an ultra high-end residential ship. So this is not like VRV or the World. This is very high end. It was scheduled to have its maiden originally at the end of this year.

Linzi:

Okay.

Mark:

When it was first announced, but it's now going to have it in 2028. So a lot of times past since it was first the concept of first announced, and its first one will be an 800 night world cruise 800 nights. So that's what he's starting off with. Then on the second cruise, so that's what he's starting off with. Then on the second cruise, the passengers slash residents get to vote on the itinerary. Ultimately, it's the captain who has final say.

Linzi:

Okay.

Mark:

But it means that they have a lot more choice in where they go on these.

Linzi:

Can they also vote off passengers that they're not happy with?

Mark:

I don't know if they can do that, because I don't know if I could do 800 nights. That's a lot of nights. Each suite has its own butler and they range in size from 430 square feet, which is roughly about double the size of an average balcony cabin on a normal cruise ship, up to 2,500 square feet, that's bigger than our flat. It is way bigger. It includes all meals, beverages with the meals, including premium drinks and wines, wi-fi and even spa treatments.

Mark:

So I'm going to test you now for 800 nights yeah, how much do you think the prices are starting at? Oh, so bear in mind, this is to buy to live on it for 800 nights no, no, you live on it for more than that. Uh, I haven't seen the full details. I can't tell you how much it is. It's not just that one cruise you're. You're buying a space on there. They reckon that the ship will last 50 years. So from reading what I read, it sounds to me that you get this for 50 years and all the drinks and let me know in the comments if I'm wrong, but that's what it appeared to say.

Linzi:

There is an ongoing um, like a home owner's do you have to pay a home in a home like a hitch away?

Mark:

yeah, there's a bill each year's a bill each year, but they haven't said how much it is, but they've said it's reasonable Okay. But again, reasonable's a relative term for this.

Linzi:

When you're paying the sort of money.

Mark:

Yeah, so I'll put it into a little bit of context. If I remember right, the V-A-V one, yeah. That one started for the cabins I think, at 74 000, okay, and you got that for three years. Okay, okay, I've got it, I've got it okay so where are you going?

Linzi:

one million dollars?

Mark:

that's what you think, that's what it's starting prices, yes, and what's it going up to? $20 million $20 million for a cabin.

Linzi:

For 50 years, if only it was that cheap?

Mark:

The starting price starts at $8 million.

Linzi:

Wow.

Mark:

And goes up to $110 million.

Linzi:

I don't think that's for me. I don't think that's for me, it's not for me.

Mark:

I mean no, that's for me. I definitely know it's not for me.

Linzi:

I mean no, even if I won the EuroMillions.

Mark:

On a big jackpot, on a mega jackpot, on a mega jackpot. But that would be all of your food and accommodation, set for the rest of your life, and you can bequeath it to people.

Linzi:

And bequeathing it. Because of all the blue trains.

Mark:

Yeah, absolutely, and be queefing it because of all the blue trains. Yeah, absolutely, because the other passenger voted you off. But you can also rent it out for six months at a time as well.

Linzi:

I'm not sure, that's me, even if we had the money.

Mark:

No, it's very expensive.

Linzi:

I'm not sure.

Mark:

I will be fascinated to have a look at it. I'll be looking forward to the youtube videos when people are touring it and showing it off.

Linzi:

I've got the pearls and the diamonds, darling but you've got the look for it.

Mark:

I've got the bank account.

Linzi:

No the look for it you have.

Mark:

Maybe not now for those that listen, england, you just rearranged her hair.

Linzi:

Because it's always so, so so.

Mark:

Work end of day hair.

Linzi:

No, it's just, it's always pristine, my hair.

Mark:

It is Always when you're listening to it. It's always immaculate.

Linzi:

It's not like I've got out of bed ever.

Mark:

Cruise Story 2.

Linzi:

Oh, is that our new number one, that's number one.

Mark:

Yeah, We've got two more. Oh my God, Wow. Virgin Voyages.

Linzi:

Love Virgin Voyages, we do.

Mark:

They have said that they're introducing some new menus, some shows and stuff across the fleet, starting pretty much now oh lovely. So some of the culinary updates, oh nice, included on Extra Virgin, for instance, yes, which is their Italian. Yeah, include dishes such as seafood risotto, lovely.

Linzi:

And roasted monkfish. Oh, we'll have to go sometime to the risotto match. Celebrity.

Mark:

Yeah, eden Gumby the.

Linzi:

Korean barbecue. Yeah, I've been there.

Mark:

He's going to completely refresh his menu to add things like bulgogi fire meat Don't know what that is, kim things like bulgogi fire meat don't know what that is kimbap rolls and bo sam, which is whole roasted pork butt with oysters and caviar.

Linzi:

Wow, that sounds fabulous.

Mark:

That's going to be introduced in july, okay, so there's obviously a lot more than that as well. For entertainment. Yeah, scarlet lady's kicking things off a little bit, where it's transforming its theatre into a hub for musical celebration spanning multiple areas in two new shows. Lovely. First one is going to be called the Y2K New Year Party.

Linzi:

Oh, is that when everything dies? Yeah.

Mark:

And the second one is a concert. I think it's called. It's a Rock Shockey, where guests sing along with a live band. Okay, that sounds fun. They're also introducing on Scarlet and again, I expect these will roll out across the fleet if they're successful, because we've seen it go the other way, Adding a new supper club called Lolz L-O-L-Z. What do you think Lolz is? Laugh Out Loud. Yeah, it's a comedy club.

Linzi:

Okay.

Mark:

It's a free dinner show, so it's not like another Rose, no okay, where they have comedians in the manor nightclub paired with a three-course meal.

Linzi:

That sounds fun, yeah.

Mark:

And then Brilliant Lady, when she comes on in September, is debuting shows that draw on the musical heritage of virgin records, richard branson's amazing, that sounds fun celebrating five decades of that. So we're going to see everything from the sex pistols on, so that should be fantastic, wonderful. What's your thoughts on that? Yes, it's nice to see them constantly evolving it, because when they've got those restaurants, we've said it before that once you've done it, three or four different times and the menu's not changed.

Mark:

An advocate for them, you want to see them changing it and not just like the menu in the test kitchen, but constantly refreshing it. And they obviously listen to that and they're doing it. Cruise story number three okay the last one.

Linzi:

Okay, the last one.

Mark:

You might like this one. I might you might. Holland America has partnered up with the History Channel. I like it already. They've just revealed a three-year partnership with them Wow when the History Channel is going to help curate itineraries and shore excursions that focus on historical elements.

Linzi:

Wow, I love that I thought, brilliant idea.

Mark:

So they haven't announced that many itineraries yet, but what they've said is some sample voyages that they're already working with the History Channel on, including a 14-day Arctic journey and Northern Lights, lovely and a seven-day Mediterranean marvels of Pompeii and Norwegian fjords, and then the Arctic journey, one, for instance, I think that is October next year, october 26th, yeah, and it'll visit several ports, some of which we've been to, like Alisund.

Linzi:

Been there.

Mark:

We haven't been to Tromsø or Trondheim. I'd love to go to Tromsø, though, but then it's going to cross the Arctic Circle, oh, and then go to the Shetland Islands.

Linzi:

Shetland Islands and look at the Neolithic sites there.

Mark:

Yeah, absolutely, and it's going to do things like the Trondheim Heritage Trail. Traditions of Norway and Bergen a walk with huskies.

Linzi:

Oh, with historical huskies.

Mark:

Historical huskies, and then when it goes to Stavanger been there, been there, looking at the city that dates back to the Middle Ages and going through so I think that's such a great partnership. Yes, yeah, we've talked recently about things like I think, was it Princess that partnered with the country music one? It might not have been Princess, I remember talking about it, but there seems to be increasingly more of these partnerships going on. Yeah, no, I love that. I think that's just a really good one to how much the excursions will be.

Linzi:

Oh, it'll be so much.

Mark:

We will wait and see so much Hopefully. I can't remember which ship it is. It might be Celebrity who do the Discovery ones. The partner with the Discovery Channel.

Linzi:

I think it is Celebrity.

Mark:

And they are a premium. They are, and their excursions are already expensive anyway. So it'll be real interesting to see when they come out. But that's starting next year, yeah, and that brings us up to the end of the episode.

Linzi:

Well, cheers darling.

Mark:

Cheers Lance.

Linzi:

Thank you for listening. Be careful what you're searching.

Mark:

Smurf.

Linzi:

And have a lovely day.

Mark:

I'll play us out with a little moon music.

Linzi:

Yes, I like it. ©. Transcript Emily Beynon.